I have been hiking Monserate hill for 16 years. I have seen it on days scorched and scarred under the strain of the summer sun. I have also seen it on days when the sky, the clouds, and the colors of the hill and the colors on the hill contrast sharply, yet blend so brilliantly that I can’t imagine a more beautiful place.
When the whites, grays, and blues of the sky give texture to, and light up the colors of the growth, there are few places I would rather be. On average though, the view from the top, even an ordinary day, still helps squelch the demons in my head.
As the hill looks differently on different days, the way my body responds to the hill’s demands can also vary. There are good days, when I feel strong getting to the top, and I feel like I own the hill. There are also those not-so-good days, when the legs get heavy, my heart pounds, and my lungs burn to the point of wanting to stop. On average though, even the days when it’s painful getting to the top, the fact the I got there, soothes my mood.
Crux Of Joy…
Rare is the day though, when a beautiful day and a strong outing intersect. That happened today. The look of the landscape and the trip to the top were each as good as good gets. That they intersected on the same day was glorious.
I woke this day ready to blow my brains out, and I’m sorry the that scares or offends anyone. I have allowed myself to get too caught up in the nonsense of the world these past few weeks. By mid-day, and with the aid of a few cancellations, I knew I needed to take a dose of serotonin.
Though I often take my phone to this hill to check-in and post pictures on social media, today I left my phone behind – and had the best outing I have ever had, both aesthetically and physically. By the time I reached the top, I was 3 complete universes away from presidential politics, trivial conversations turned toxic, and the caustic sounds of the motorcycles and meth heads on Main Street.
That I didn’t have my phone to take pictures or record my time made today this trip up that much sweeter. I have no doubt this was my fastest outing in 16 years. If there has been a more beautiful day of skies and new spring growth, I have never seen it. Today was glorious, even if it couldn’t be quantified with pictures and a clock. It was one of the best moments of my life in recent years. It’s why Al Gore invented to word, stoke.
The only record of – the only truth that will ever be known about today’s outing will be these words, perhaps to be read 10,000 years from now when some cyber-archeologist unearths my Facebook remains. For me though, today was a memory shot – a moment in time that I will remember for the rest of my life.
Tomorrow all the joy I feel right now might bled from my veins before my coffee cools, and that’s okay, that’s how life is. I always get through those difficult times when the weight of my depression seems insurmountable, because I always remember that it always passes – always. I hope you can cling to that too. Be well… rc
This is begins a new phase for me, and with this platform. Though I will continue writing essays as time permits, I intend to post more frequently and with more varied musings on a variety of topics.
If you are not already a subscriber, please scroll up and do so. Tell your friends about me — about what happens when I push the STOP button on the blender in my head. Oh, and there’s this from Coconut Records. Enjoy…